Amnesia: The Dark Descent - [Game] - (Zulszaek)

 First-Person Survival Horror for Windows, Mac OS X & Linux.


The first time you open the game, you see a disclaimer that reads thusly.

"Amnesia should not be played to win. Instead, focus on immersing yourself in the game's world and story.

The world of Amnesia is a dangerous place and you are extremely vulnerable. Do not try to fight the enemies encountered. Instead, use your wits. Hide, or even run if necessary.

The interplay between light and dark is very important to the game and because of this it is vital to set up the gamma correctly. Also make sure to play in a dark room and wear headphones for the best effect."

The game is horrifying. The amount of detail put into making every empty room, every tiny, distant sound, every flicker of light as foreboding and nervewracking as possible is incredible. Your footsteps echo hauntingly through the ghostly hallways. Any time a bit of crumbling mortar falls near enough for you to hear but out of sight enough for you to not know if it was a monster or not, your character will begin audibly hyperventilating and panicking. The only way to survive is to hide from monsters in the dark, but the longer you remain in the dark, the more your sanity drains. You are helpless against them, completely unable to defend yourself except to run into the nearest room and barricade the door. Enormous, unknown creatures roar furiously at you through the walls and through caved-in chambers. Is that someone screaming for help, or is it simply your mind playing with you due to the effects of your rapidly degenerating mental state? No matter where you are, you never feel safe. The more insane you become, the more distorted things are. Hallways will twist and fall out of focus. Paintings hanging on the walls will inexplicably warp into grotesque mockeries of their former depictions of nobility. Hallucinations, both auditory and visual, plague you constantly.

Anyway, all ruthless plugging aside, Amnesia is a horrific masterpiece of a game. I highly recommend it to anyone who has any interest in entering a world rich in fear, with incredible immersive potential. Even if you're not normally into horror, you should play it anyway because it's just that good of a game.

And astoundingly, it wasn't even made by a large gaming conglomerate. It's five Swedish dudes working from their homes. There are a few working torrents for the game, but I suggest buying it. It's only $20, and the money is going to feed these dudes.

If you would like to purchase the game or check out some videos, here is the link to the official website: Amnesia: The Dark Descent

Bathory - Hammerheart - (Nickoli)

Genre(s): Black Metal, Viking/Thrash Metal
Lyrical Theme(s): Anti-Christ, Satan (old), Norse Mythology, Odinism
Origin: Sweden (Stockholm)
Last Label: Black Mark Production
Status: Split-up

No matter how long ago Tomas Forsberg passed away, his music, every album lives on in each one of us that loved him and his tunes that he put out just about each year. "Hammerheart" is no different, giving birth to a whole new sub-genre is exactly what this album did, giving life to Viking Metal, as we know it today.

Every album up until "Hammerheart" was just violent, raw and aggressive, no mellowness to it at all, with this record though, Bathory brought us a sense of changes that were for the better, in my opinion. As many people love to call this record black metal, it is not that at all, it's pure, heavy "lets sail ships at dawn to take back our land" viking metal, at it's best might I add.

A lot of people have said the production is not very good on this album. I have to disagree with this. True, it’s not a high fidelity undertaking but the most impressive thing about the recording is that it always sounds rich and deep despite the limited budget. The mixing in of all those ambient sounds of fires, choral backing vocals, crashing waves, nature and movement is always convincing.

There are no clunkers to be found on this record. I think that the weakest tracks to be found here are "Baptized in Fire and Ice" and "Valhalla" and that says something because both of those songs are great. As much as I love the first four Bathory albums, "Hammerheart" continues to be my favorite and is in heavy rotation in the autumn and winter months of the year. This record is highly recommended to any fan of black, folk or viking metal that has not heard it and is, in my opinion, one of the greatest heavy metal records of all time. You’ll get swept away in it, I have no doubt about that.

Dedicated to the memory of Quorthon, 1966 - 2004.

"The vast gates to hall up high
Shall stand open wide and welcome you with all its within
And Oden shall hail YOU, Bearer of a pounding Hammerheart..."

98% out of 100%

Download Album Here

Akphaezya - Anthology II: Links from the Dead Trinity - (Nickoli)

Genre(s): Avant-garde Gothic/Progressive
Lyrical Theme(s): Fiction, Fantasy
Origin: France (Orleans, Centre)
Current Label: Ascendance Records
Status: Active

When you hear anything Avant-garde, it's not normal, it's a special form of being that will best listened if you are on some form of acid or shrooms, "Anthology II: Links from the Dead Trinity" is no acception either. This is the most "all over the place" album I've heard in a long time and I fucking love it with all my heart. Nehl Aelin drives this wrecking force of a band, perfecting everything from growls to low end jazzy type vocals, even an operatic style that seems to be very welcome in avant-garde these days.

If you are asking yourself, "Where is Anthology I.....?", there is no album that exist.....yet. It seems as if Akphaezya works in a weird form of developing music and releasing stuff. Listening to this record, you might hear things that don't exist, at times it feels like they have a whole orchestra behind them but that is far from the case. Normal band: Guitar, Bass, Vocals, Keyboards and Drums, doesn't make sense to me either people but I go with it, not sure why though. One minute you could be headbanging so hard your face is smashing against your keyboard and the next second you could be listening to one of the most beautiful, mellow piece of art you'll ever heard in your entire life.

This review may not make sense at all, that's because it's hard to review an album that doesn't make any damn sense. You will scratch your head while listening to this album, on the other hand you'll fall in love with it from the very beginning.

In the world of Akphaezya, everything is possible but nobody can do anything but Akphaezya. A beautiful world filled with unexplainable objects and floating elephants, that's what you get in when you travel to Akphaezya. Enjoy the time you spend at this place because they only have one album as of right now.

Overall Rating: 97% out of 100%

Download Album Here

Machete (2010) [Cunthulhu]

Two words, and two words only, describe this movie:

FUCKING GLORIOUS

Plot-wise, this is the worst piece of shit ever laid onto film. But that is far, far besides the point. The point of this movie is to entertain mindlessly, and that it achieves in flying colors of red and skin-tone. From the moment a woman pulls a phone out of her cunt and makes a call, to the time a weedwacker is used as a weapon, this is the most entertaining movie of the year, and one of the most all-time.

The acting is terrible, and the script is overloaded with cheesy one-liners. This is a throwback to a time when movies were more focused on being memorable rather than as an outlet to show off a director's pretentiousness, ie the 80s. The physically impossible and completely absurd moments make this a really creative movie, even if the plot is laughable. I saw this in theaters with two friends and we were all pissing ourselves laughing, as was the rest of the audience.

This film got some hype for Lindsey Lohan acting in it, and her acting is God-tier awful, but it is countered the uber-awesome fact that she is a fucking nun.

Praise the Lord!

To sum it up, this movie is just plain awesome and hilarious. It needs not be taken seriously.

9/10

Not feeling so hot....

A headache, running nose, stomach pains and a bladder that never lets me sit or lay for more than 10 minutes, I am sick.

Nearly every time I get sick, it's pretty crucial stuff but I rarely get sick, maybe once ever 2 years or so.

With that being said, no review for me until I get to feeling better. I'll be in bed, watching X-Files and Sanctuary Season 1 & 2, trying to catch up before October 15th when Sanctuary Season 3 premieres on Sci-Fi (SyFy) @ 10/9c. Check the link here for any info you may need: http://www.syfy.com/sanctuary/index.php

Also, I will be reviewing Sanctuary Season 1, Sanctuary Season 2 after I finish them. Stay tuned for those.

Sorry for the inconvenience and I hope to be reviewing again very very soon, just have to get better, that's all.

Thank you all and I hope you are enjoying this blog.

My name is...

Cunthulhu, and I like cunts.

Big, juicy ones. The kind that come on mini-van driving soccer moms.

Anyways, I am a new contributor at this blog which focuses on the finer things in life. Thank you to Nick for the invitation, this will (hopefully) be more successful than my top 500 blog which I have abandoned for a limited time due to lack of interest/having a fucked up computer.

Cheers.

Vesperian Sorrow - Psychotic Sculpture - (Nickoli)

Genre(s): Symphonic Black Metal
Lyrical Theme(s): Astral, Sadness, Sorrow, Darkness
Origin: Austin, Texas, USA
Current Label: Unsigned
Status: Active


First thing's first, this album has an opening that no other band can touch, roaring pedals with a slight touch of symphonic keyboards in the background sets the mood perfect for the smooth road ahead, this is the world of Vesperian Sorrow, hope you enjoy it.

9 years ago, these dudes released a little album called "Psychotic Sculpture" and proving that a very underrated band from Austin, Texas has mastered the sound that so many bands have been trying to accomplish for years.

Dark, foggy, gruesome and cold are the words that I picture as this album blasts into my ears, it seems to be the soundtrack that you don't want playing as you're getting chased through the woods by some mass murderer, yet the only enjoyable part is the music while getting chased by some insane killer. Even though throughout this whole album it seems dark and dreadful with no light at the end of the tunnel, you're smiling at this beautiful dark melody of wonderful tunes. In what crazy world can you listen to something so sadistic and evil but still have a huge smile on your face? The world of Vesperian Sorrow, of course. The guitars are just raw enough to give you the feel of a straight raw black metal project yet they slam you with the melody to brighten it up a bit. As most symphonic black metal bands count on their keyboards to make it as "kvlt" as possible, Vesperian Sorrow does the exact opposite, using the keys just the right amount and not to loud that you can't hear anything else on the record. What about the drums, you ask? Kristoph can bring the fucking noise, with the super fast pedals and the amazing organized beats he creates. One of my favorite drummers of the new era, he never lets up with his speed or creativity.

It's incredibly hard to compare this band with anyone or even mention a band they sort of sound like. I can say one thing though, at least you don't sound like Cradle of Filth because if you did, this album would of been turned off within the first 2 to 3 minutes. With sweeps and very clean production, this album needs more light shined upon it, period. More symphonic black metal projects need to look at this band for inspiration, something had to change inside the walls of the symphonic BM tower and this is it.

Download it. Buy it. Steal it. Listen to it. Love it.

Download Album Here